Archive for the ‘Advice for Women’ Category

Ten Mistakes Women Make When Having Sex With a Man

Tuesday, June 1st, 2010

By: Rod Phillips

You see a lot of articles about what men can do during sex to make it better for the woman, but there’s a lot less information – and opinion – on the mistakes women make. So, to set the record straight, here’s our list of ten things for women to avoid.

1 Expecting him to think like a woman

We’ve all seen loads of books with titles like “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus” which highlight an unfortunate difference between the sexes. Men and women don’t think the same way – and while we’re not going to get into why this happens, it’s important to remember that fact when you’re in a relationship. In general, men are not as romantic as women, they don’t see romance as a necessary prelude to sex, and they can divorce sex from their feelings in a way that perhaps most women can’t. So there will be plenty of times when a man wants sex even if he isn’t feeling romantic and connected to his partner.
For him, the physical pleasure of sex is a reward in itself. He doesn’t need to be seduced into feeling desire (though he may appreciate it if you do seduce him!), at least most of the time, for his sex drive is a pretty constant part of his maleness. I think that’s what women don’t understand.

They know how elusive and emotional their own sex drive is, but they don’t appreciate how different it is for a man. Think of it this way: men can enjoy sex with their partner whether they are feeling loving or not; in fact they often find their feelings of love for their partner when they have sex with her. By contrast, women often say they need to feel loving before they want sex – or at least before they are prepared to give themselves heart and soul to a man.

2 Not showing your sexual energy

Women who were brought up to be demure “good girls” (i.e. non-sexual) may find it difficult to express the essence of their feminine energy during sex. And a lot of women also have problems expressing their anger, an emotion which can add real spice to the sexual union between men and women. This lack of sexual energy might appear as a reluctance to initiate sex, a reluctance to be the active partner, a reluctance to make noises or thrust, or simply an overall tendency to wait for the man to lead and direct what happens during sex.

But believe me, ladies, your man will really like it when you express your passion – whether that means you getting on top for woman on top sex, moving in a way that will give you the greatest pleasure, kissing him passionately, or being assertive about what you want in bed.

3 Being too gentle when you touch his penis

Men like a firmer touch than women, especially when it comes to their penises. If you ever have the pleasure of watching him masturbate, you’ll see how much pressure he uses on his penis – especially as he nears orgasm. If you’re doing it for him, ask him to tell you what you’re doing right and what he’d like done differently. He’ll really appreciate your efforts to give him more pleasure.

4 Not experimenting with sex

The saying has it that men think about sex ten times an hour – or is it a hundred? Yes, of course that’s an exaggeration, but it isn’t much of one. While some women have a high sexual desire, it’s true to say that women in general are much less sexy than men when they’re not in the bedroom. Men fantasize all the time – about the things they see, what they’d like to do, how they’d like to do it, and so on. With such an active sexual imagination, it’s not hard to understand why a bit of variation in the bedroom routine can keep a man sexually happy.

It doesn’t have to be way out stuff like bondage, either. For example, try changing sex positions once in a while: take the initiative and get on top of him or let him enjoy rear entry for a change. Talk dirty to him if you’ve never tried that before; explore and play with new parts of his body, such as his anus and perineum, during foreplay – or even during the main event. Seduce him into a “quickie” by leaving a trail of clothes across the floor into the bedroom. Greet him at the door in sexy clothing. Phone him at work and tell him what you’d like to do to him later that day…..well, you get the idea – use your imagination!

5 Expecting him to read your mind

Yes, we know it’s difficult to express your sexual desires directly. But men don’t think like women. They don’t read clues, they don’t get hints. So stop communicating indirectly, and tell him what you want. And give him feedback when you get it! That way, he’ll know exactly what he’s supposed to be doing, how you feel about it, and whether to do it again. For example, if you like what he’s doing during sex, let him know with your moans of pleasure.

6 Criticizing him

I think one of the reasons women can be so critical of their man is that they’ve never learned the art of direct communication. Than means stating clearly and directly what you want, how you want it, and whether you got it – and how you feel about it afterwards. Men appreciate that style of talk – they know where they stand and it removes the uncertainty for them.

Criticism is an indirect way of saying that your needs are not being met – but if you read number 5 above, then maybe you’ve begun to understand that your man won’t know what you want unless you tell him. If you’re judging his love for you on the basis of his ability to anticipate and meet your needs without you saying what they are, well, I’m afraid you aren’t likely to be very satisfied. And it won’t be his fault.

7 Letting him take responsibility for your orgasm

A lot of us think that a man somehow has a responsibility to “give” a woman an orgasm during sex. After all, that’s how a lot of us were brought up – that a man somehow has to look after “his” woman. And that idea extends to making sure she has an orgasm during sex…..but the truth is that women are responsible for their own orgasms. So while it might be nice for your man to help you get there, if you don’t make it to orgasm through his efforts, you can always take matters into your own hands.

8 Controlling him by withdrawing sex

One of the most unhealthy things you can do in a relationship is to use sex as a weapon. This is basically a statement that you feel powerless, that you think withholding sex is the only way you can get what you want. Rather than trying to exert some influence over your man by denying him the pleasure of your body, try communicating directly what you want and don’t want. (That might even extend to simply saying you don’t feel emotionally close enough to your partner to want sex.)

9 Thinking he’ll feel the same way about your body that you do

It just isn’t so. Men don’t attach the judgments to women’s bodies that women do. So, for example, even if he thinks your butt really is a bit on the large side, it won’t matter to him the way it matters to you. In fact, he probably quite likes it. And he certainly won’t be put off making love, or want the lights off, because of it. While you waste time and emotional energy wondering if you’re completely undesirable because of some aspect of your body, he’ll never give it a second thought. It’s women who judge their bodies, I think for the sake of comparison with other women, not men.

10 Not making up with sex after an argument

Well, yes, I know that a lot of couples do make up with sex when they’ve had an argument, but in fact many more don’t. As I said above, most women think that they need to be feeling loving and emotionally close before they want sex. Yet I’ve met a lot of couples in my work as a sexual therapist who have found that taking the risk and jumping into bed can work really well as a way of getting close again.

Even if you don’t feel sexy or loving when you start making love, after a while the simple act of being physically connected in bed can really change the way you feel about each other. The other way of settling an argument (that’s talking, seeking understanding, and thrashing out how you feel) is fine: but once in a while try a more direct method of getting your feelings back on track – just go to bed together!

Rod Phillips

About the Author

Rod Phillips is a writer for Sex Techniques And Positions. Send your comments and ideas for better sex to tips@sex-techniques-and-positions.com

(ArticlesBase SC #74632)

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/Ten Mistakes Women Make When Having Sex With a Man

Seduce a Man and Make Him Beg for More

Tuesday, June 1st, 2010

By: Jim Warren

It’s not usual for a woman to have feelings for a man. Take for example, you sight this man in a bus station, and simply cannot get your eyes off him. Most women in this situation become annoyed with themselves and try to suppress their feelings as much as they can.

They’re reacting this way does them no good. Though its common place for men to ask women out, there’s currently no book of conduct that says women having feelings for men can’t seduce them such that his interest in them arouses.

Seducing a man can be as easy as it can be hard without knowing what to do. You need to know the right things to do at the right time. Failure to do such might leave you feeling like a flirt but seduce a man the right way and feel like a champion as he chases you.

The aim of seducing a man should not to ask him out. The aim is to arouse his interest in you while making him feel that he was the one who liked you first. Men love winning women over and if you seduce a man right, you’ll still get the chance to play hard to get with him.

As I list these steps, it’s not necessary for you to follow through on all of them. In most cases, you only have to execute the first and second steps to get the male to notice and approach you. If carrying out these initial steps does not bring about results, you can move to the more drastic approach step.

First Step: Dress to Kill

With this first step, you need to be very careful so as not to go overboard. Capitalize on the cloth wear that brings out the best in you. Clothes that amplify your body curves are preferred. You should put on a seductive perfume and wear your make-up light.

Second Step: Initiate Eye Contact

Initiate eye contact in such a way it looks completely naturally and always remember to be the one to disconnect from such eye contact. You might want to smile while he’s eyeing you but this is a personal preference. Just make sure your face is not showing a frown.

Third Step: The Approach

With this step, you need to be very careful. Before making the approach, you should think about something that can begin a conversation between you both. Asking for directions is an effective example of a conversation starter.

Your approach should seem completely natural and remember to smile all the way. When you get to him, speak softly, and conduct body gestures that promote your gender and personal beauty. In doing this, you can flaunt your hair occasionally or bite your lips.

By now, he should have picked up on your little question and should be diverting from it at any moment. Remember to make him feel comfortable while conversing with you.

This is where you pass on the mantle to the man in charge. Let him take control of the situation.

He does not know you already like him and you have the opportunity to make him be the one chasing you.

In seducing a man the right way, shyness should be last on your mind. Keep your head up and seduce that man you like because for all we care he might end up as your lifetime partner.

About the Author

Jim Warren is a relationship advocate who loves to write about ways to stop your divorce and ways to seduce a man. He also reveals insider secrets that can help you save your marriage, even if you are the only one trying. For more info visit: http://www.waystoseduceamaneasy.com

(ArticlesBase SC #385686)

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/Seduce a Man and Make Him Beg for More

How to Get a Shy Man to Ask You Out

Tuesday, June 1st, 2010

By: Caterina Christakos

As a dating coach, one of the top questions that I get is,”How to seduce a shy man.”

Well the answer is easily. Shy men are usually grateful to have you approach them. They may be in absolute love or lust with you but feel like it will never happen because they can not drum up the nerve to approach you.

Just like we sometimes think guys are out of our league, men sometimes feel the same way about us. They are afraid of being ridiculed and rejected. A shy guy may have this fear in abundance.

By approaching him, you take that pressure away. Do it slowly. Strike up a conversation the first time. Invite him for coffee the next, etc.

Try to get him to laugh at a joke. Humor is a great way to break the ice and put him at ease.

Also give him non verbal signs that you are interested.

I will break this down in to three parts:

1) How to Flirt – You can do more flirting with your eyes than with any other technique. Look at him then look away then look back again. Or stare him right in the eyes and hold his gaze then smile real slow.

Use the quick lip lick. The hair toss. The hair curl around the finger technique.

Try this eyebrow raise, that I mention in my book. Do a double to really get his attention.

We are all born with the ability to flirt. Look at any two year old and you can see it. We start flirting young then end up getting guilted out of doing it or warned against doing it because of office politics. You know how. You are simply out of practice. So that is your fun assignment for the day – practice, practice, practice.

2) When to flirt – Flirt when you are truly interested, flirt when you want the other person to feel good, flirt when you are feeling good yourself. There is no hard and fast rule about flirting.

3) When not to flirt – Don not take your level of flirting farther than you want to go. Don not flirt with someone you know really likes you if you do not share those feelings. Don not flirt with someone whos job might be at stake if taken the wrong way. Do not flirt with your best friends boyfriend.

Walk into the situation knowing that you are beautiful, desireable, funny and intelligent. You may end up being the one to ask him out.

A confident woman always looks more attractive. Do whatever it takes to achieve that confidence.

1) Take the time to fix yourself up before leaving home.
2) Put on a scent that makes you feel sexy.
3) Dress in a way that makes you feel desireable without exposing too much.
4) Plan topics of conversation ahead of time, if you like.
5) Take beauty classes or etiquette classes if you feel that will help.
6) Develop one area of yourself that you excel at and you will have a topic of conversation that you can talk passionately about. That passion will come through in the flush of your cheeks and the sparkle in your eyes.

Once he understands that you really like him, Mr. Shy guy may be ready to direct a few interesting suggestions in your direction.

About the Author

Caterina Christakos is an dating coach and published author. For even more seduction tips go to:
www.seductiondiva.com

(ArticlesBase SC #72732)

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/How to Get a Shy Man to Ask You Out

7 Incredible Ways to Reconnect With your Husband Or Boyfriend

Tuesday, June 1st, 2010

By: Mailcucan

There are times in every relationship when other commitments take priority over your husband or your boyfriend, but these times can hurt a relationship. When you start to notice that you haven’t been as close as you once were, you will want to start taking steps that will reconnect you with your partner and re-establish the strong relationship that you once had.

Realize that the mess can wait

Some women believe that they are being constantly judged by how their house or their living space looks. However, this is far from the case. Instead of making cleaning the majority of your free time, why not allow yourself to let more things go at the end of the day to make room for your relationship? Instead of having the laundry always done and the kitchen always shining, isn’t your relationship worth the time?

Take time for yourself

Many women will feel more connected in their relationships if they take the time to make themselves look good. Something as simple as getting out of sweatpants and tee shirts at the end of the day and into nice jeans and a well-fitting top can help you feel more confident and thus, more attractive to your partner. You don’t have to look like a model, but taking care of your appearance can help you feel like one.

Create a date

At least once a week, you and your partner need to get out of the house and on a date. Too often, long relationships think that they are ‘past’ that, so they settle into a dull life of staying at home. When you were first dating, you went to the movies and out to eat why not try to do that more now? Sure, you won’t be able to do it every week, but if you try, you will both have something to look forward to.

Stop your thinking

Many times, a woman can become frustrated by everything that she is handling, especially when she’s a mom as well as a career woman. When this happens, you might feel as though you could scream at your partner for not being helpful enough, romantic enough, etc. But is this really going to reconnect your relationship? It can help to stop your thinking for a few seconds before you share these kinds of feelings. You might find that you’re actually feeling something else that’s not directed at him.

Put the spotlight on him

When you take the time to do something special for someone else, you will reap the benefits of feeling closer to them as well. Something as simple as packing a lunch or writing a love note in their wallet can be a great way to help your partner know that you care. Everyone likes to feel special.

When you can’t get away

It’s time to be creative if you’re unable to get away from the house. Maybe you can create date night at home, or work together on some goals that you’ve wanted to accomplish. Play board games do whatever you both like to do together. If you have a home remodeling project, don’t leave it just for him, do it together to get more couple time.

About the Author

Relationship Tips – Relationship Advice – Relationship Help Save Relationship With our Potent 4-Step Strategy which work! This incredible package will help you save your relationship or marriage! Thousands of satisfied readers cannot go wrong! More free family and relationship tips available here.

(ArticlesBase SC #62458)

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